One Halloween night about twenty one years ago Steve, Grandma, our toddler and I set off to a Harvest Festival for the evening. Madison and I were dressed with cat ears and tails and I had used eye pencil to blacken our noses and give us whiskers. Dad was all in wearing rat ears and grey sweat suit, his look completed with a long, pink felt tail. Nana kept her dignity with standard street clothes.
It was a Friday evening and the traffic seemed extra frenzied as people hurried to get where they wanted to go. In spite of my extra caution, a last minute lane change by another driver caused me to hit him from behind. It was a low speed, low impact incident. We took care of the necessities, got back home, changed cars and headed back out to continue what we had planned for. It was not a big deal.
Twelve months later I was sitting in the living room and there was a knock at the door. In an envelope handed to me by a Sheriff was the paperwork stating that we were being sued for 250,000.00. Apparently the accident had “robbed the victim of his joy of life”.
The year that followed was full of legal things which were completely new and foreign to us. Looking back is easier now and even funny in so many ways, but then I was horrified and filled with fear and frustration.
The attorney assigned to us by our insurance company was not someone we would have chosen and certainly not someone who gave us confidence in his competence. In the months of meetings and depositions that followed, the history of the hatred between him and the attorney for the other side was made very clear. They detested each other. The verbal assaults and cursing between them in our presence was something not just unprofessional but unnerving for me.
I don’t have a clear remembrance of the year that led up to our court date, but I do recall having a lot of mental monologues and recitations of what clever things I would say that would give us a “win” in court. I remember being frustrated when told I wouldn’t even get a chance to tell my side of the story. I would only be allowed to give specific answers to specific questions that were asked of me. They would be questions asked not by my attorney, but of the one who was trying to make his case against me… my Accuser.
Trying to construct clever and pithy responses to hypothetical questions proved to be a difficult and fruitless activity, even for me, one who loves the sport of it. I didn’t know what his tactics would be. I didn’t know what kind of questions he would ask me. Any thoughts I had about how to prepare an argument for my defense were totally unsatisfactory in giving me peace.
During that long year I also had begun a collection of hope giving and encouraging verses I’d come across in reading my bible or at church. I added them to index cards kept in a paper clipped stack.
The court date finally arrived; jury selection completed, testimony given by experts in accident reconstruction, auto damage, and orthopedics and testimony given by the other party. His account of the incident was so wild it wasn’t recognizable as the event we had been involved in.
As the time drew close for me to take the stand, Fear crept up in me like a rising tide and I thumbed through my index cards to try to stay grounded. None of the arguments I had pre-constructed in my mind would have been able to speak in my defense of the charges against me. Even if I had really come up with something good I could not have been able to mentally retrieve it.
I focused down on my stack of cards on one verse that, almost funny to me, spoke so personally and exactly to this moment in time.
“When they drag you into their courts, before rulers and authorities, don’t worry about defending yourselves—about what you’ll say or how you’ll say it.
The right words will be there.
The Holy Spirit will give you the right words when the time comes.” Luke 12:11-12
As they called me to come to the stand my mind felt blank, but not in fear. It was as though I was blanketed with a calm peace, which truly surpassed my logic and understanding.
The accusing attorney stepped toward me and asked a few questions. I gave short, specific answers. He asked me if I need glasses or was wearing corrective lenses or sunglasses at the time of the accident, to which I answered, no. Immediately he pulled out an enlarged copy of a photo taken of me at the scene and asked me, what he thought would be his big “gotcha! Caught cha’ lyin’ Mrs. Hougard!” question. He showed the picture to the jury, then to me and asked “…Then, What is this on your head?”
I looked at the photo, at the jury and at him,“…Cat ears...” I answered.
There were some snickers from the jury.
That was it? That was it!! That was the big moment I had worried about and had tried to plan for my defense and mentally chewed on for over a year?
That was it?
That was it.
Thank you Mrs. Hougard. You can return to your seat.
Why would God have brought this verse across my path months before?
Why would he have told me, a standard, domestic house-wife (or in this case, house-cat) that I should not worry when brought before this court and authority about what I should say to defend myself?
I suppose, had there been some great argument from the accuser it would mean that I would need a great defense, and my Defender, the spirit of God would have given me the wisdom, the clarity of mind and the nimble, profound verbal ability to state my case for the “win”.
But in this case, in the months prior, my Defender had told me not to worry about what I would say because He knew the baseless and foolish nature of the case against me…and of the one’s who were bringing it, and he allowed them to bury themselves. He didn’t want me to worry about it, to stress over or lose sleep over it.
I only wish I had the ears to hear and grasp the truth of that earlier in the process.
There were a LOT of other ridiculous theatrics that went on during the week, right up to the moment the jury was dismissed to deliberate, but for the sake of closure, it took the jury only seven minutes of discussion to conclude what they all clearly saw and come back with their decision.
Not guilty.
Do NOT worry about how to defend yourself. Trust the One who will whisper in your ear and give you exactly what you need to say in the moment you need it.
“Meow”
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